Talk about emo... this IS emo... : (

Well, i am just a BOY who very honestly and seriously just want to WAIT upon God. It's so exciting really... just that some things popped out recently that seriously caused me to be a little shaken, but well, i must proclaim that i am more than a conqueror through Him who loves me! So yaay!

Tommorow is Valentine's Day... but i feel so relaxed, because i am not intending to ask anyone out. I must admit that i do like girls, and i believe that God has set apart my special ezer kenegdo for me... BUT actually, since the start of this year, i know that God says to me that now is not the time, and truthfully i do submit to that fully. I MUST study hard and continue seeking out the path He's set before me to take, not swaying to the left nor to the right. So i am not going to give out the Rose during this time too... : )

Friday is the Vday event! P.S. I Love You... so exciting... haha... woohoo!

And next month is AlphaTrack! Hopefully i can really go for it... HUNGRY FOR A MIGHTY MOVE OF GOD! THIRSTY FOR THE HOLY SPIRIT! and i know the time is coming! where God will MOVE mightily and the HOLY SPIRIT poured out on all flesh! Let those who have eyes see! and those who have ears hear! Amen HalleluYah!

P.S. I love you LORD : )

Te voglio bene assai, ma tanto tanto bene sai.

What a mess!
Is now my heart, my soul, my mind and my strength i confess...
My heart is hit with flaming arrows,
Here and there the blood flows...
My soul struggles,
To break all the strongholds
My mind, it keeps spinning,
With the thoughts of my inmost being...
My strength is gone,
And i wade in the darkness all forlorn...
From Him, I am far away,
And my perseverance sways...
I just keep on falling,
My heart is failing...
I am really not emotional i say,
Just different in many ways...
And I thought my friends were heaven sent,
But now, i don't even feel treated like a friend...
Perhaps you say i think too much,
But against you, your actions vouch...
At the end of this tug,
I know my True Friend hugs...
He makes me new again!
On me He pours out his love like rain...
And my heart, my soul, my mind and my strength He refresh...
Oh no more mess!

Dear friends, as promised, this is the essay i talked about. Hope it helps you in understanding the Old Testament.

The Conquest and the Ethical Question of War

Many readers of Joshua (and other OT books) are deeply troubled by the role that warfare plays in this account of God’s dealings with his people. Not a few relieve their ethical scruples by ascribing the author’s perspective to a pre-Christian (and sub-Christian) stage of moral development that the Christian, in the light of Christ’s teaching, must repudiate and transcend. Hence the main thread of the narrative line of Joshua is an offense to them.

It must be remembered, however, that the book of Joshua does not address itself to the abstract ethical question of war as a means for gaining human ends. It can only be understood in the context of the history of redemption unfolding in the Pentateuch, with its interplay of divine grace and judgment. Of that story it is the direct continuation.

Joshua is not an epic account of Israel’s heroic generation or the story of Israel’s conquest of Canaan with the aid of her national deity. It is rather the story of how God, to whom the whole world belongs, at one stage in the history of redemption reconquered a portion of the earth from the powers of this world that had claimed it for themselves, defending their claims by force of arms and reliance on their false gods. It tells how God commissioned his people to serve as his army under the leadership of his servant Joshua, to take Canaan in his name out of the hands of the idolatrous and dissolute Canaanites (whose measure of sin was now full; see Ge 15:16 and note). It further tells how he aided them in the enterprise and gave them conditional tenancy in his land in fulfillment of the ancient pledge he had made to Israel’s ancestors, Abraham, Isaac and Jacob.

Joshua is the story of the kingdom of God breaking into the world of nations at a time when national and political entities were viewed as the creation of the gods and living proofs of their power. Thus the Lord’s triumph over the Canaanites testified to the world that the God of Israel is the one true and living God, whose claim on the world is absolute. It was also a warning to the nations that the irresistible advance of the kingdom of God would ultimately disinherit all those who opposed it, giving place in the earth only to those who acknowledge and serve the Lord. At once an act of redemption and judgment, it gave notice of the outcome of history and anticipated the final destiny of humankind and the creation.

The battles for Canaan were therefore the Lord’s war, undertaken at a particular time in the program of redemption. God gave his people under Joshua no commission or license to conquer the world with the sword but a particular, limited mission. The conquered land itself would not become Israel’s national possession by right of conquest, but it belonged to the Lord. So the land had to be cleansed of all remnants of paganism. Its people and their wealth were not for Israel to seize as the booty of war from which to enrich themselves (as Achan tried to do, ch. 7) but were placed under God’s ban (were to be devoted to God to dispense with as he pleased). On that land Israel was to establish a commonwealth faithful to the righteous rule of God and thus be a witness (and a blessing) to the nations. If Israel became unfaithful and conformed to Canaanite culture and practice, it would in turn lose its place in the Lord’s land—as Israel almost did in the days of the judges, and as it eventually did in the exile.

War is a terrible curse that the human race brings on itself as it seeks to possess the earth by its own unrighteous ways. But it pales before the curse that awaits all those who do not heed God’s testimony to himself or his warnings—those who oppose the rule of God and reject his offer of grace. The God of the second Joshua (Jesus) is the God of the first Joshua also. Although now for a time he reaches out to the whole world with the gospel (and commissions his people urgently to carry his offer of peace to all nations), the sword of his judgment waits in the wings—and his second Joshua will wield it (Rev 19:11–16).

NIV Study Bible by Zondervan.

Sometimes, i really feel like giving up on some of the things in my life. It seems to me that they will never work out. But yet i remember...

Luke 18:27 
Jesus replied, "What is impossible with men is possible with God."

Many things... like what i am called to do, the girl i am to bring along on my adventure, keeping a tight rein on my tongue... all these seem so impossible to my human mind. BUT yet, again and again, God tells me that all things are possible with Him! Hallelujah! So to all you guys out there who feel like giving up, i say trust in God! there are no harms but only good! and I am certain He will guide you through as long as it is His Will, which is to give you the very best you can ever have in your life! God bless!

Nobody knows, how weak I am
Better than You 
Nobody sees, all of my needs 
Better than You
And nobody has, the power to change me
To what I was born to be
Jesus be strong in my weakness
Empower me

Chorus:
Empower me
Like a rushing river flowing to the sea
Lord, send your Holy Spirit
Flowing out through me
Till I'm living as Your child
Victorious and free
Send the power of Your love
Empower me

Nobody's eyes, see through my soul
Better than Yours
Nobody's love, can make me whole
No love but Yours
And nobody has, the power to lift me
To reach for eternity 
Jesus break through all my defenses
Empower me

You must watch this, my friends!

Wow... time really flies... i am gonna be 21 soon! and i am gonna study for my degree real soon! i think soon i'll be looking forward to the birth of my first son! hahahahaha i really look far boy. That's the good thing with having perfect eyesight. But well, after all is said, i still will pray God's will be done in my life! Because it's the only way i know that my life will be lived to the fullest! Amen!

I guess i'll just put into words here, the visions for this year so that in 2009 when anyone looks back at this entry, this will testify of how God has been faithful to me! Praise God in advance, because i know He's always faithful in all He says and does! Hallelujah!  

1) Luke 2:52. "And Jesus grew in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and men." This is allusive to that which was recorded of the prophet Samuel when he was a boy. I will grow in wisdom and stature!

2) Truthfulness. I've realised the importance of Truthfulness, and this year, i will work on it even more. so that my jokes will not be the bane of my life to take away the credibility of the words which God will use me to speak! Here I am LORD, use me!

There are deeper thoughts to these though, which you might be able to uncover through me in real life. Speak to me and say TRUTH! Zech! TRUTH! and i will do my best to give you truth. most likely, this will help me in the second point too. so YAH! Praise God.

I have more things to tell, but i'll leave it to next time! : )

PS: I read in a certain blog these exact words. "grad cell briefing. zech is in it! wahahaha. awesome!!!" and I wonder what's so awesome about me, i really wonder.

Days of Elijah by Paul Wilbur